Afterwards

Picture of Mother
Normal Is Gone!

Written by and for people with Lived Experience - Port Alberni Community Action Team - Families Helping Families

Today's Learning Moment – 05 24 22 Issue: Afterwards.

I naively believed that once my son had stopped using drugs, life would miraculously be "normal" again.

However, that has not been the case, or at least it's not for him or our family. After-effects of drug use, overdoses, and head injuries when he was actively using substances continue to plague his everyday life. My worst fears have been realized. Who he once was is now gone, replaced by a broken version of his former self. This new version displays many behavioural problems that are distressing or irritating both to him, his family and his friends.

Sleep deprivation causes him to go for several days without sleeping. Then, he will literally blackout while standing, sitting or basically anywhere.  He will fall to the floor, often hitting the edge of a counter or other sharp surface, opening up cuts on his head and body. One time he hit a cupboard door so hard that it broke. He sometimes will sleep for several days, sporadically, babbling incoherently at times and hallucinating. The doctor calls it sleep-deprived psychosis.

I barely sleep, worried about what he might do, or I get startled awake by crashes when he falls.

He fixates on grandiose plans and ideas, none of which come to fruition.

Then, briefly, he can return to being the son I never stopped loving, and I can relax and enjoy his company again.

The local pharmacist comes here daily to administer his oral doses of Suboxone. Thankfully he is a positive person with whom we can communicate about my son's health issues.

It is extremely difficult to see the local physician who treats substance disorders. Although we live in a community with over fifty doctors, only one has agreed to provide substance disorder treatment and medications. I'm sure the poor man is overwhelmed by his workload, and the mental stress must be very high. He usually rushes my son through appointments. It is the only opportunity to speak to the doctor. Sadly those appointments seem to only be about handing out or adjusting medications.

After many years, we are still waiting for him to see a psychologist. That process was requested by a counsellor who suddenly retired, and the subsequent counsellor left quickly as well.

A sleep apnea test was requested, but the machine broke. My son has become so frustrated that he has just given up and more or less drifts through life in a depressed existence interspersed with panic attacks.

The attitude of some of the police belittles him and others who suffer from mental health issues. A few cops are bullies and create so much stigma that it has increased my son's mental health challenges. We have witnessed the same pattern with others suffering from concurrent disorders in our community. As a result, some of his peers become more depressed while others lash out from the shameful treatment and enter into a cyclical pattern of unhealthy behaviours, frequently resulting in new arrests and harassment.

Treatment at the hospital is frequently demeaning once drug addiction or alcoholism is noted on the person's chart, even if they have not used substances for a year or more. Staff concerns about violence are understandable, but some just see the addiction rather than seeing the person as one whose addiction is only one part of them.


These cycles continue, yet we do not have answers or solutions from the doctors. Maybe, one day.

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Author
: Jen Wilson  – Jen is a pseudonym for a mother who supports her adult son. He suffers from concurrent disorders.

Families Helping Families is an initiative of the Port Alberni Community Action Team. We regularly send out "Learning Moment" articles to help folks understand substance illness. Knowledge is vital in understanding the disorder of our family members. You may copy, distribute or share our articles as long as you retain the attribution. Add yourself to our distribution list by dropping us a note at - albernihelp@gmail.com 

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